Saturday, September 26, 2015

It's Getting To Be That Time Of The Year

Me with "medium fur"
Beards. Love 'em or hate 'em, it's getting to be that time of year when I typically start to cultivate a fur piece on my chin, at the least, or all over my face, which is what I did last year. Now, I have to make another decision on what to do, or maybe even not do, with regard to a beard.

The reasons why I would even do this at all are several, but mainly, the beard is there to ward off the cold Northwest Winds as I commute to work. It works pretty well, and it doesn't take a lot to make a difference. There is also the whole "not shaving" thing, but that is kind of a myth, if you want something on your face that doesn't look like a snarled wad of cat hair. While you may not use the razor much, you will be trimming, washing, and grooming that thing on your face, and that all takes at least as much time as shaving. Maybe more. So, not shaving isn't really a reason to have a beard. For me, it's staying away from a razor because it irritates mt skin in Winter, which is a good reason to grow the growth.

Now, Mrs. Guitar Ted is definitely not in favor of a beard, and she will let me know that on a regular basis. Usually, I have to negotiate a "cut off" date to even grow one. The "cut off" date is when I promise the beard will come off. Of course, she'd rather I didn't grow it at all, and that's one reason against this.

With my Renegade Gents teammates. This is the "massive beard" look. 
During Trans Iowa recon. Minimal beard growth.
There is also the aforementioned "beard maintenance" routine, which is a pain in the rear if the beard gets really big and massive, like mine did last Winter. There is also the whole, "Hey Santa Claus! ha ha ha! snicker...How was Christmas this year?", and other such great barbs I heard when I had the big beard. Trust me, that gets old really fast. 

Finally, there is the whole "hipster" thing with regard to beards. Now I never went in for the whole "slicked down", beard oiled, pointy mustachioed look, but if you have a beard, you get lumped in with the crowd. I know.....big deal, but it is there none the less. To make matters worse, I ride fat bikes. Let's not even get into that scene and beards.

Anyway, one way or the other, I'll probably grow the fur again and be glad I did when the cold winds begin to howl. I may not go whole hog with the super big beard again, but there will probably be something, and cycling will be the better for it as far as I am concerned. Besides, I can't let my Renegade Gents Race team mates down, can I? No. I can't.

So, I better start laying off that razor soon. The days are getting shorter....


Charles Martin said...

If mama isn't happy, nobodys happy

Wally Kilburg said...

You can make some extra cash as a mall Santa over the holidays!

50voltphantom said...

I can't make seem to make it past the "really itchy" phase without shaving, even WITH my wife's motivation. How you guys do it I'll never know.

STF_ill said...

I tried to grow a beard once and realized that there are a few patches that don't fill in. Surprisingly, my wife supports beards. They are also itchy, which is sucks. And the whole food in beard thing grossed me out when it first happened :(